The Weekly TPS Report – Feb 24

Thanks to a couple of pretty solid American’s – Washington and Lincoln – we were graced with having Monday off from work (and some really great sales at the mall). However, while I was trying to cram 5+ days of work into a 4-day work week, I still managed to find some time to better myself.

Ladies and gentleman, I bring you some of what I learned this week.

  • I think there is a direct correlation between the higher the title at work and their propensity to forget decisions that were made which don’t favor them.
  • I can find great solace sitting by myself at a big wooden bar, with a nice drink (or 2) and a good book.
  • No good can come from a flurry of emails after 10pm.
  • Despite being called an Executive Summary, executives never use them.
  • Knowing my kid is preparing to be a Hobo is comforting and has me questioning if I should keep funding the education.
  • It’s disturbing how days off intended to celebrate dead people make my entire month.
    Courtesy of @Bitchygrlprob
  • If you want to play Mr Passive Aggressive with me I will skip the passive part with you.
  • PTO is an acronym for Paid Time Off.
    However, my company seems to think it stands for: Possible Time Off – While We Continue To Email And Call You Asking For Things That Aren’t Urgent And Can Likely Wait.
  • If your email is longer than most articles in The Economist, might I suggest a brief summary in the email and putting the detail into an attachment.
  • If I were running Best Buy I’d also sell alcohol as it’s clear that whenever you embark on a Domestic IT call you’ll need to drink.
  • When I am President I will:
      • Mandate coffee breaks. And, not in the break room, you must get out of the office for a bit – only good coffee will be allowed.
      • Make stupidity punishable by something very painful…and public.
      • Mandate a CV President’s Day holiday to celebrate ME. On this holiday, all the private work force will have a 4-day weekend and all government employees still have to work.

Have a good weekend folks. It’s a long stretch to Memorial Day. Plan accordingly.


About CubicleViews

Observations, thoughts & random bitching about cube life, food, beer, wine, whiskey and sometimes politics. Living the dream in a 6×8 doorless polyester walled cell.
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2 Responses to The Weekly TPS Report – Feb 24

  1. A Causal Observer says:

    I am in full support of your presidential platform. And after watching/reading about the current political circus, CV will definitely be the write-in candidate on my 2012 ballot.

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