The Weekly TPS Report – March 9

It’s been a whirlwind week and the good news is that it went by fast. Friday already? I love it when I have that thought. Overall a pretty good week, so at least I’ve got that going for me.

Alright, let’s cut to it. What did I observe above the 5 ft high polyester wall (and elsewhere) this week?

  • I forget lots of things when I go to the grocery store, but how in the world did I forget more Gentleman Jack? Two demerits.
  • How is it that someone can have a staff meeting yet three-fourths of the attendees are not part of his staff? I smell change in the corporate winds (which smells oddly similar to microwaved fish).
  • My kids will go days with a clogged toilet as apparently I am the only one who knows how to work a plunger in this house. Equal rights my ass – only when it’s convenient and/or not gross.
  • Just like there is no crying in baseball, clearly there is no common sense in my company.
  • Given the quantity of milk this family goes through in a single week – hell in two days – I’m seriously thinking of buying a cow. Plus, then I’d have a cow! I’d call her Bessie. Don’t judge.
  • Whenever you are at work, doing the commute thing, at Costco – or any big box retailer on a Sunday afternoon, look to the left, then look to the right. Each of their votes counts as much as yours. Scary shit eh?
  • Sometimes it’s nice to have Grandpa being the cause of embarrassment in my kids lives vs me.
  • I promise all my coworkers that if you call my cell phone before 7 am your super urgent item will go to the bottom of the pile.
  • Joining a conference call and immediately announcing that you’ll be right back because you have to go to the bathroom is one of the most disgusting things I’ve heard all week. But, points for not taking the call to the bathroom on your dorky bluetooth headset.
  • Always have an exit strategy.
  • My readers made me happy this week with not 1, but 2 days of the highest views of my blog ever. Thanks!
  • Perhaps the smartest thing I did all week was NOT going on vacation. Trust me, if you read this post you’ll understand. Maybe next week though…

Happy Friday, but happier weekend!


About CubicleViews

Observations, thoughts & random bitching about cube life, food, beer, wine, whiskey and sometimes politics. Living the dream in a 6×8 doorless polyester walled cell.
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3 Responses to The Weekly TPS Report – March 9

  1. HAHA! Love it! Hilarious.

  2. I love it!! And Bessie is the perfect cow name 🙂

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